Today I’m doing something a little different and not talking about mesh. I know right? How unlike me!
So why am I not talking about mesh? Well, perhaps it’s because today I’m feeling a little introspective, or perhaps in need of catharsis, but either way, I wanted to talk to you all about something that you’d like to think would be obvious… I want to talk to you about being kind to one another.
Lately I’ve been feeling a little out of sorts, a bit flat. My usual zest for the latest mesh has been lagging a little, and I’ve been trying to work out why, because it used to excite me so much. After thinking long and hard about it, I realised – my excitement is there, but so is fear. Now I know what you’re thinking – what do you have to be afraid of? Well to be truthful, people.
I started this blog two and half years ago, and what I truly wanted to share the excitement about mesh bodies, then mesh heads, then fashion that comes with it… but above all, I wanted to help teach people how to use mesh bodies and heads, because back then it was a ‘you’re on your own’ kind of experience. Since then, as often happens when new markets are forged, mesh bodies and heads have become a way of life in SL, with competing brands and products available for users – all of which is to be expected and very exciting in itself, because emerging markets breed creativity, which in turn provides new options to consumers.
Fast forward to now, and in particular a few weeks ago. A few weeks ago I was contacted and abused by a creator. Now in itself this isn’t unique, it happens, and unfortunately lately it’s been becoming more prevalent. Designers abusing customers or bloggers, bloggers abusing designers, customers abusing designers…. you name it, it’s happening. The question is – why? Now in my circumstance, I’ve encountered many kinds of abuse whilst blogging, most of which I shrug off as people simply finding an outlet for whatever it is they’re going through, but this particular instance a few weeks ago shook me a little. The designer in question accused me of favoritism towards another brand because I had blogged one before the other. Now as false as this is and as much as I didn’t need nor deserve their nasty comments – it made me stop and realise an unfortunate fact of blogging – over time, expectations have grown, competitiveness has become more rife and in turn the pressure has mounted on me to a point that I’m struggling with it. No longer am I simply reviewing an item and offering my thoughts on it – I’m receiving items to review, then being sent messages daily asking why I haven’t reviewed it yet. I’m getting told about updates to items then being harassed when I don’t update my blog fast enough. I’m being accused of not supporting a brand because I haven’t updated a list to include them yet.
And that’s just me. I’m also watching designer friends cry when they recieve abusive IM’s or notecards because of the most mundane issues! When did this society that we created ourselves start to tolerate such disgusting behaviour? SL is a user created world – it’s a world that to an extent we control too, and yet somehow it’s become ‘okay’ for a designer to swear about ‘fucking customers’ or a customer to leave abusive reviews on marketplace just because the colour of the top they liked was a fatpack exclusive, or the item they want isn’t in their size, or whatever.
So, to those amazing people who take the time to read my posts, I wanted to say a few things. Firstly, that I love the support you all offer me, and I am forever in your debt for that. Don’t worry, MBA isn’t going anywhere – that’s not the point of this. The point of this is to make the 1 in every 100 people who read this who may have abused a designer, or a blogger, or a customer – or just another person – think about what they’ve done, and hopefully not repeat it.
We are human. We are flawed…. but we are also defined by our actions. What are your actions saying about you?
Be kind to one another. I love you guys.
Mesh Head – Maxine by LAQ (Skin used is built in, tone 1.o) – New mesh head!
Mesh Body – Lara by Maitreya
Hair – Farah by Mina (Available on the 1st Nov at Fameshed)
Top – Dragon Sports Bra by Vinyl (Available at Uber) – Includes Belleza (all), Maitreya & Slink (both) sizes
Shorts – Jae Shorts by SPIRIT (Available at Uber) – Includes Belleza (Isis & Freya), Maitreya & Slink (both) sizes
Boots – Craven Boots by Blueberry – Includes Belleza (Isis & Freya), Maitreya & Slink (both) sizes